Bogan Bingo

bogan¹ ˈbəʊg(ə)n/. noun

AUSTRALIAN/NZinformalderogatory

An uncouth or unsophisticated person, regarded as being of low social status.

“some bogans yelled at us from their cars”

Now, if you’ve never been to Australia you may not have heard the term ‘Bogan’ before. Having been lucky enough to go and even meet some real life Bogans, I had a bit of an inkling what the ‘Bogan’ part of Bogan Bingo might entail, but I’ll be honest, the bingo part was basically a mystery.

I’d never seen the appeal of someone calling out numbers to a room full of the retired in the vain hope that someone might yell bingo and win a prize. Fortunately, this misconception couldn’t have been further from the truth on this occasion.

Arriving at ‘The Slug’ in Fulham, I honestly thought I’d been swept, in some tardis-like device 10,000 miles away to the backstreets of Sydney and any one of the slightly scuzzy bars I used to frequent while backpacking around the land of spiders, snakes and the Minogues. There were AFL kits framed on walls, signs warning of kangaroos next 400km and the kind of paint job that made it easy to hide whatever fluids might get spilt.

After finding our seats the show soon began and honestly, it was one bloody amazing laugh from the very get go. Kicking off with some blasting power ballads for their intro and never letting up for the rest of the evening, our hosts were decked out in full on Bogan gear – denim short shorts, check shirts, wife-beaters and bullet wigs, complete with Axl Rose style bandanas. Coming out all guns blazing in a hail of Bogan insults and catch phrases, it was pretty clear we were not in for an intellectual night, but frankly, it didn’t matter.

Guiding us through the suitably confusing rules of Bogan Bingo and teaching us the relevant chants and shout-alongs ’54 – your mum’s a hor…ticulturalist!’ the show never let up. With serious prizes to be won from the board of famous Bogans, including Russell Crowe, Cindy Lauper and yes, you guessed it, Jesus, there was plenty play for. The main prize for the evening was a seven day trip to Jordan. A stonking prize in anyone’s eyes!

Not only did the jokes and innuendo come thick and fast, but so did the booze and bar tabs. They certainly didn’t beat about the bush and honestly, I can say I haven’t had such a fun night out in a long time. I will be making the pilgrimage to Fulham again, as soon as I can round up a bunch of mates to go along with!

Reporter: Pete Churchill 

Bogan Bingo is on every Thursday evening at The Slug in Fulham. Directions here. They can also be found on Twitter, Facebook and YouTube.