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How to close down the company you hate
I orchestrated an elaborate hoax to shut down the business for at least a day. I turned up early and a van marked “Toxic Waste Solutions” screeched past me. 3 men in nuclear boiler suits ran out, tipped luminous green paint on the floor and cordoned off the building. …
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How to pretend you believe your Manager’s lies
Managers are pathological liars. Most have been lying for so long they don’t even realise they’re lying. You mustn’t let them know you see through them… It’s just as well that I’m also a pathological liar. In my interview I lied about: 1. Planning to stay here for years. 2. …
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How to improve your personal impact in a professional setting
Maya Angelou famously stated, “People may not remember exactly what you did or what you said, but they will always remember how you made them feel”. Impressions are made within seconds, and it is very difficult to change how others feel about you once an impression has been made. Your…
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How to look busy whilst doing nothing
** Our Monday comedy piece will get you over those Monday Blues… Remember this not advice, just purely entertainment*** I’ve taken to looking out of the window to try to ease my boredom. However, I only have a skip to look at, which intensifies my despair. I’ve started making lists,…
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How to bump up your holiday allowance
** First day back after the long weekend? Its time to laugh with our comedy blog *** The worse your job the less holiday days you will receive. The legal minimum for full time workers is 28, which after bank holidays is more like 20. If your pay is…