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How to Hide being sacked from previous jobs
*** Our Monday Comedy Blog – To make going to work a little more light hearted *** I have an impeccable dismissal record. Whilst only 18 I’d already been sacked from 4 jobs for my sick days, lateness, bad attitude and general incompetence. I expertly cover my tracks so current…
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How to hide that you’re applying for other jobs
*** This is not advice and is purely for entertainment purposes only *** Managers frown on you looking for other jobs, although they’re probably doing so themselves. Everyone wants a better job and after all you could get sacked tomorrow. If you’re angling for a pay-rise you should let…
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Asos Profits Fall
We all love asos for their dynamic fashion statements and also their success story from being a relatively small company to a global online presence. asos has today reported a 22% fall in its first half profits as it has used funds to grow its infrastructure internationally. The investment strategy…
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How to break the silence in your office
Whenever I’m in an uncomfortably silent environment I feel compelled to make lots of noise and behave very inappropriately. My office is completely silent…until I kick into action. I feed off My Manager’s disapproving expression as I become increasingly unruly. I asked a customer (Mr Williams) if he was any…
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How to avoid conversations with Management
Conversations with Management are a mine field. You have to fake enthusiasm, excitement and interest. I prefer to avoid them entirely. As I see my Manager approach, I pick up my phone and dial a random number. When he asks me something I mouth “big new customer” and start…