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How to sabotage a client visit
Before every client visit Management warn me to behave appropriately. I conspire with colleagues and we decide to set a pig loose in the office, but this is London and farmyard animals are hard to find. We are already on final warnings over a recent bout of impromptu singing to…
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How to defeat the office seating plan
After several days of myself and two colleagues singing to customers down the phone the moderator picked up on this. A seating plan was introduced and I was moved to the other side of the room. I set about overcoming this seating plan by still conversing with my wayward colleagues…
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How to Manage a Hangover in the Job you Hate
*** This post should not be taken as advise, it is purely for entertainment purposes only *** I delight in mid-week drinking, gulping my beer happily and deciding whether I can get away with another sick day or not. As a stoic Northerner I usually turn up the…
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Why you shouldn’t get promoted from the job you hate
*** Warning this is just for jokes! This is not to be taken as advice in any way*** The only time I’ve been promoted was from a job that didn’t exist that I invented to get an actual job. I shouldn’t have bothered. I was quickly sacked for my disruptive…
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How to survive January in the job you hate?
**** Warning this post is hilarious and just for laughs. DO NOT TAKE AS FACTUAL ADVICE **** January is a month-long hangover from hell, and paracetamol won’t help. Xmas and New Year celebrations have decimated the overdraft you said you wouldn’t use. You need a new job or a pay-rise.…
