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Doppleganger
The following may seem far-fetched, but I assure you it is all true I exited Northampton Train Station and quickly spotted my friend Alastair waiting in his car to pick me up. He had his new girlfriend next to him. I wondered whether she’d like me more than his last…
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How to avoid murdering your manager
I stare at my greedy, walrus of a Manager and wonder whether today will be the day where I snap. I’ve worked through several stress balls, regularly take prescription painkillers and shout into the sink. These no longer stifle my rage. He stands behind me, looking at my screen and…
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How to get put on gardening leave
*** Not advice just something to make you laugh on a Monday *** Having resigned I decided I didn’t want to work my notice month. I sat with my arms crossed for the entire afternoon to give them an idea of my work ethic for the upcoming month. “Imagine…
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High Society: The Homeless Man
Denny walked out of Century Members Club and swaggered quickly down Shaftsbury Avenue. In each hand was an item formerly belonging to someone else; in his left hand a golden pocket watch and in his right were keys to a Porsche. It had been a good week of swindling for…
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How to survive a pep talk from the Manager you hate
I had a pep talk from my Manager on Thursday. I called in sick on Friday and resigned on Monday. I don’t like pep talks. I demanded an urgent meeting with two senior Managers to tell them that my £360 pay rise was an insult. I questioned why it’d taken…